Admit it, we are the same....

I think one of the biggest pet peeves I have is feeling embarrassed, and for 3 months now that’s how I have been feeling……..I want to say something so bad but I know what I want to say isn’t going to change anything, I’m sure it would only make things worse dealing with the fact that this being is malicious and wallows in its own shit for the rest of the world to feel sorry for it (personally I think it just needs a really good blow and fuck ,the kind that you think your brain is going to explode out of your head). Why did you look at me all those time? I know why I looked at you, it was for a different reason than yours, do even you know that? Now I’m starting to feel sick, just knowing the fact that there will be times we might be in the same part of the city and I’m going to be the only one out of the 2 of us that’s going to care, my heart is going to race, my palms are going sweat, my stomach is going to feel weak and you’re never going to know this or care. So it turns back around to me feeling embarrassed for falling for a being that will never look or think about me.
If I could have a moment with you, I would push you up against the wall and tell you how much we are the same and how little we are different and then when the tears start that’s when I let parts of your shirt that’s crumpled up in my hands go and walk away and only hope you will come up behind me, turn me around and tell me, “your right”.

Liam Gallagher save me.

I sit in front of this computer home on a Friday night, it's been a while, being home on a Friday night; I've put Oasis "wonderwall" on repeat, i love when he say's " because maybe your going to be the one that save's me", lately i would like to be saved from this city. I love San Francisco, i was born and raised here, and so were my parents, i'm a rare breed. So i love SF but i dont think SF loves me, but then again i think no matter where i live (if i ever move) i will always be the fish out of water. I was really thinking about this the other day, the fish out of water thing, being that it was a topic in my acting class, " why do i feel thats my title of my life?" I think parts of it have to with the school i went to; when you go to a school with 60 kids from 6th to 12th grade.............it was a nightmare. We didnt have the sports games, dances and all the other things that a normal school has, i missed out on so much, and now being 24 i feel i'm playing catch up with myself more then ever, as if i know i'm going to die at 24 or something. I'm more board with myself then ever, i'm questing myself more then ever, and i have never been more into myself then ever. So Liam Gallagher will you save me form this fire that is out in my heart?